My cousin Tony is hollering at me to “wake up, we’re going to war”.
I hopped right up off the couch ready to brawl.
I was five months into my first divorce
and was partying hard.
Tony and I had been up for a couple days
snorting speed and drinking beer
and generally
being perfect examples
of a couple of dirty white boys,
hustling, cheating and thieving people;
going nowhere fast.
I jumped up ready to brawl
cause I was figuring
was coming to collect a little karma from us.
Tony is looking at me
all bug eyes mouth hanging open
and I am confused by his reaction.
Why aint we fighting?
Where is the threat?
What the fuck you wake me up for?
Then I saw the television.
Everything got really weird.
it was just all the dope and booze running through me
it was just a denial defense mechanism in my mind.
I don’t know,
but everything went slow motion.
Tony’s daughters faces are confused and scared.
Tony is frozen in time.
But I could smell the coffee
brewing in the pot.
The gurgling of the coffee was thunderous.
The Television is telling me a horrible lie
and I can’t look away.
Mental Defense time right?
so Tony is being an asshole
and waking me to see this movie preview.
What, is this another Die Hard movie?
That’s what I really thought looking at the T.V.
Those exact words ran through my mind
as the 2nd plane ran through the Tower.

The difference between
Pearl Harbor
is the difference shared
by Lincoln and Kennedy.

We watched 9/11 happen.
Nation wide.
Almost everyone
knows where
they were
what they were
doing 14 years ago.

I think America
went a little mad
this day 14 years ago.
And for better or for worse,
we showed the whole world
there is a price for fucking with us.
And for better or for worse
I think we lost our way.

I sometimes
if it’s possible
for an entire country
to be traumatized


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